JEFF SHATTUCK MUSIC

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Good lunch, good read, bad feeling — at Zebulon in SF.

I headed over to Zebulon for lunch today. It’s a funky little sandwich/burger place located on a hip ‘n gritty alleyway in SF’s SOMA district. I brought my lyric book with me because Zebulon’s walls seem to hold ideas, but I also brought the new issue of Uncut, which features Kate Bush on the cover. Uncut and Kate won my attentions.

As I read about the making of Kate Bush’s Hounds of Love, one of my very favorite albums of all time, and munched my sandwich, everything was cool. But on finishing the article, I made the mistake of flipping to Uncut’s reviews section. I flipped the pages… and flipped… and flipped some more.

I began to feel the way I do when I enter a bookstore: hopeless. I mean, how does anyone ever stand out from these crowds? There are so many people out there creating art. I should feel good about this, I think, because what better evidence is there that humanity isn’t a complete waste of molecules than art? But I don’t. Instead, I feel like giving up. I won’t, of course, but, man, it’s daunting, you know?

I wish I could just enjoy the journey. I wish I could not care a whit whether I have any commercial success. But I do…